Samstag, 24. März 2007
Donnerstag, 15. März 2007
Management Lesson
Lesson One!
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"
The eagle answered: "Sure, why not" So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Two:
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull." They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.
The next day he reached the second branch and,
finally, after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Management Lesson:
Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Lesson Three:
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. there,
a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.
The dung was actually thawing him out! He laid there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung,
and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lesson :
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend..
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"
The eagle answered: "Sure, why not" So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Two:
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull." They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.
The next day he reached the second branch and,
finally, after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Management Lesson:
Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Lesson Three:
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. there,
a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.
The dung was actually thawing him out! He laid there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung,
and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lesson :
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend..
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
Did you know
1. Most American car horns honk in the key of F.
2. The name Wendy was made up for the book "Peter Pan."
3. Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.
4. Every time you lick a stamp, you consume 1/10 of a calorie.
5. The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
6. Studies show that if a cat falls off the seventh floor of a building it has about thirty percent less
chance of surviving than a cat that falls off the twentieth floor. It supposedly takes about eight
floors for the cat to realize what is occurring, relax and correct itself.
7. Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks otherwise it will digest itself.
8. The citrus soda 7-UP was created in 1929; '7' was selected after the original 7-ounce containers and 'UP'
for the direction of the bubbles.
9. 101 Dalmatians, Peter Pan, Lady and the Tramp, and Mulan are the only Disney cartoons where both parents
are present and don't die throughout the movie. .
10. A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.
11. 'Stewardesses' is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.
12. To escape the grip of a crocodile's jaws, push your thumbs into its eyeballs - it will let you go instantly.
13. Reindeer like to eat bananas.
14. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver and purple.
15. The word "samba" means "to rub navels together."
16. Mel Blanc (the voice of Bugs Bunny) was allergic to carrots.
17. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
18. The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin during World War II Killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.
19. More people are killed annually by donkeys than airplane crashes.
20. A 'jiffy' is a unit of time for 1/100th of a second.
2. The name Wendy was made up for the book "Peter Pan."
3. Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.
4. Every time you lick a stamp, you consume 1/10 of a calorie.
5. The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
6. Studies show that if a cat falls off the seventh floor of a building it has about thirty percent less
chance of surviving than a cat that falls off the twentieth floor. It supposedly takes about eight
floors for the cat to realize what is occurring, relax and correct itself.
7. Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks otherwise it will digest itself.
8. The citrus soda 7-UP was created in 1929; '7' was selected after the original 7-ounce containers and 'UP'
for the direction of the bubbles.
9. 101 Dalmatians, Peter Pan, Lady and the Tramp, and Mulan are the only Disney cartoons where both parents
are present and don't die throughout the movie. .
10. A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.
11. 'Stewardesses' is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.
12. To escape the grip of a crocodile's jaws, push your thumbs into its eyeballs - it will let you go instantly.
13. Reindeer like to eat bananas.
14. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver and purple.
15. The word "samba" means "to rub navels together."
16. Mel Blanc (the voice of Bugs Bunny) was allergic to carrots.
17. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
18. The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin during World War II Killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.
19. More people are killed annually by donkeys than airplane crashes.
20. A 'jiffy' is a unit of time for 1/100th of a second.
Dienstag, 13. März 2007
Some funny stuff i found
Hello world!
I was surfing the matrix while i found this funny stuff.
If it should happen that you are at work and really bored that lean back
, relax and take a look! :D
This one is a VERY FUNNY advertisement - campaign of
APPLE!
The one i like most is the Pie Chart!
The thing that makes me smile, is that the "MAC" is a sporty looking guy
and the counterpart, the "PC" is a fat and gray looking "book keeper".
I personaly like MAC's but the MAC i would like to buy is away too
expensive. Take a look through the shopping window. :D
and the other link i found, is about a kind of a self made sitcom on
youtube.
also very funy.
The guy is playing Darth Vaders Brother who is called Chad Vader.
Hope you like it!
I was surfing the matrix while i found this funny stuff.
If it should happen that you are at work and really bored that lean back
, relax and take a look! :D
This one is a VERY FUNNY advertisement - campaign of
APPLE!
The one i like most is the Pie Chart!
The thing that makes me smile, is that the "MAC" is a sporty looking guy
and the counterpart, the "PC" is a fat and gray looking "book keeper".
I personaly like MAC's but the MAC i would like to buy is away too
expensive. Take a look through the shopping window. :D
and the other link i found, is about a kind of a self made sitcom on
youtube.
also very funy.
The guy is playing Darth Vaders Brother who is called Chad Vader.
Hope you like it!
Samstag, 10. März 2007
E-3
Hello World!
I'm student of FH@Vienna. We are trying a project this year in english. All of us create a blog and write our impressions of the english lesson into it. Our teacher (Mr. Gilbert) reads them and ????
Today (10.03.2007) Mr. Gilbert showed us his favourite book, it is called "your marketing sucks". By the way, we talked about sentences with the word suck, and my almoust famous sentence with the word suck is "to loose is natures way to say you suck".
It is a saying you can find on t-shirts, and someway it makes me smile. :D
We read the first page of this book at class, and it was interesting, the language level wasn't that high, as i have expected at first. Also the first page woke my interesst and desire for reading more of it. Maybe i'll buy it and take a deeper look myself, but not now. At the moment i am really busy at work and private and i realize that time is passing by with lightspeed.
Oh and by the way it was ME, who found the blogg most people of my group found also interessting.
I didn't expect to find it again, but I started the best search engine in the world and found it!
From this page i found the link to karl who walked around the earth by foot.
Additional Info: The first link contains amazing pictures from Canada.
Thats all for now!
If someone reads this, please leave a comment if you like...
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